A Chic Paris Lockdown – Day 3 – We Are What We Talk About
April 17, 2020
I skipped Days 1, 2 & 3 from Fiona’s Ferris’s book, 30 Chic Days, when I started blogging each day of Paris’s CoVid-19 lockdown. (I started writing on Day 4 of Paris’s lockdown so wanted to start on Day 4 of Fiona’s book.) When I went back and reread those days in the book, however, I found too much valuable insight in each day to just cavalierly skip them. Let’s take a look at those first three days of 30 Chic Days before we close the book.
In Fiona Ferris’s book, 30 Chic Days, Day 3 is titled “Bathe Yourself in Mystique”. In this chapter, Fiona is talking about being more mindful of what we say. She makes the astute point that no one likes to be around someone who is continually negative or complaining or whining. Even the speaker hears her own words and is brought down by the negative energy!
Here in Paris Lockdown, being especially mindful of my words is one way I can be a positive actor in my very small world. Yes, I feel frightened and worried inside about what’s happening around the world with regards to the CoVid-19 pandemic. But my husband, children, friends and other family members don’t need to hear or read my every worried thought. In fact, I would like to be a humorous, fun companion that lifts my loved one’s mood. If I can’t manage humorous and fun, I’ll settle for quiet and calm.
How do we accomplish this feat? Fiona advises first take a deep breath. I have found the advice to be surprisingly effective! Sometimes, if I seem to be in a runaway conversation that has gone off the rails straight into negativity, I can at least pull myself together with the pause to take a deep breath. (Not huge and dramatic! It’s just a technique to give oneself a moment to pause.)
One of the tricks I am using right now to keep my external vibe set on a positive channel is to make sure that my internal space is filled with positive content. Major media outlets seem to be surviving just fine without me. (I’ve found the constant stream of stories and images quite overwhelming.) Right now, sitting in my apartment in Paris, I can do nothing to help anyone outside of my door. Helping the people inside my apartment, that I can do. If I focus on the constant flow of scary and negative information that the major media outlets supply, my energy and emotions plummet to rock bottom. Once I turned to reading and/or listening to inspiring content, I could literally feel my mood getting lighter and more positive. Maybe it’s easier to achieve “quiet and calm” than I thought!
I like how Fiona frames the concept of conversational decorum as “Bathed in Mystique.” It sounds so much more alluring and fun. Myself, I like calling the concept “Be a Pollyanna” – named after the main character in the film “Pollyanna” who was (very) positive and upbeat. Maybe, during these crazy, scary times, it’s a better idea to give ourselves and our loved ones the gift of conversation that’s cheerful and lighthearted rather than “gloom and doom.” If it’s a day where we really can’t reach cheerful, maybe calm silence is a gentler option.
