A Chic Paris Lockdown – Day 30 – What Our Feelings May Be Telling Us

 May 19, 2020

Day 30 is titled “Focus On Creating Your Own Beautiful Life” in 30 More Chic Days by Fiona Ferris. In this chapter, Fiona discusses that not-so-delightful feeling of envy that can occur when we start comparing our life, activities and/or possessions with someone else’s life, activities and stuff. Fiona mentions this dynamic in her first book, 30 Chic Days, (which I reviewed here.)  In this chapter, Fiona approaches the topic of envy from a slightly different angle. 

She writes about how she started comparing her life with someone else and felt that her own life seemed a bit boring. She began to feel unmotivated and that everything seemed like too much effort.  Once she realized that her malaise came from making comparisons, she analyzed just why the comparison made her feel that her life was ho-hum. She identified the key features of this other person’s life that seemed so alluring.  By making a list of the specific “envied” qualities, Fiona reframed each item to apply to herself. The list turned into a set of affirmations that now inspire her to incorporate the spirit of those qualities in her own life.

Fiona knew that the envy she felt was an opportunity to learn more about herself. Even though the emotion she felt was uncomfortable, she knew it was telling her something about her own thoughts and actions.

Our negative emotions can be a powerful tool – if we can stand the discomfort. Usually, I try to avoid uncomfortable emotions. Fiona presents a very different and positive way to handle those feelings. First and foremost, we need to keep our eyes on our own path. However, if there is something that seems to nag at us in the “comparison-itis” way, Fiona suggests that we pause and evaluate what is going on in our own head. It could be that the “comparison-itis” is highlighting something that we could work on in our own life.